What would it be like to be his?
by EOfan1124
Summary: She has always wondered what it would be like to be his.
1. Chapter 1

I own nothing.

Chapter 1

For years, Liv would fantasize what it would be like to be Kathy. She wanted to know what it felt like to have him in every way. She had him at work but outside of that they didn't see each other. Yes they knew a lot about each other more than most. They could read each other's thoughts but she never had all of him. Twelve years she had him fifteen hours a day, but they were chasing down perps and saving victims. They were invincible.

In the past, she would see him look at her with those blue eyes. She knew he was worried about her but never once crossed that line of being too nosy. He understood her pain and knew she would come to him if she needed him. That was true in the early years when things were easy between them. But things changed. After Gitano, Computer Crimes, Oregon, and he moved back home, they didn't talk much about the important stuff. It seemed better to leave some things out of work.

He has always been her rock and she loves him in many ways. She's not sure what she feels are for him but love is defiantly there.

So much has changed between them this past year.

_One Saturday morning El asked her to come over for a visit. He wanted to see her on their day off. So they decided to make Saturdays their day to see each other outside of work. She's not completely sure what they call it but it is like a family. She gets along with all the kids and loves them to pieces. El always picks at her for spoiling them too much. Eli is a great kid and loves to play ball with her. He calls her his Livy. It's so sweet even El tears up sometimes when he sees them together. _

_After a few weeks she noticed that Kathy was never there. She just assumed Kathy was working or out with the older girls. Usually it was just the twins and Eli there. She finally asked him why Kathy wasn't at the house. He said she had some things she was working out so she went to visit her sister in Utah for a while. She said she needed some time away from all of them. _

It's been a year and she still is not back. Eli misses her but El always tells him she will be back soon. The poor kid has needed his Mom, how could she do that to him. She tries to do as much as I can on the days she is there. El appreciates it. She just wishes he would talk to her about what is going on. She feels torn about what to do. He knows she is there for him and that's all that matters.

They usually just sit in his living room with music on after the kids are upstairs and Eli is down for the night. Liv always wondered if this was how things were when Kathy was here. Did he and Kathy spend their nights sitting together listening to their favorite songs? It's so comforting to know they can do this and not feel strange or awkward. They don't feel like they are doing anything wrong which they aren't. They're just friends hanging out. At least that's how it's been.

Until tonight.

Tonight was different and she had to say she liked where it was heading. She knew it was wrong but really Kathy left him a year ago. Did she think he would just be waiting for her to make up her mind and come back? El is a man for goodness sake. A catholic man but he's still a man. They have always been too close over these years for this to not happen.

It was an innocent night like always sitting on the couch reading and listening to music. He was reading a sports magazine and she was reading a novel.

Then it happened and she's not sure how but it did. She's not ashamed at all about it either. It was just a little kiss anyway. He was going to get some wine for them and she decided to help him so she followed him into the kitchen. He must not have heard her behind him and when he turned around they were face to face. She started laughing when she saw the look on his face. He was like a deer in headlights. Then she noticed what she really saw in his eyes pure lust. She began to grin. The all she could do gasp when he grabbed her neck and pulled her closer.

It was the moment she had been waiting for twelve long years and God is was like heaven. His lips were smooth and gentle. She just stood there for a few seconds trying to catch up and when she did it was explosive. They were all over each other. Her hands were under his shirt; his hands were on her pant covered ass. She was on the table under him before they pulled away. They just stopped and waited. She guessed they were waiting for the sky to fall. But that didn't last long then they were at it again. There was no holding back on this. All these years of wanting something like this and to finally have it was just too much. They were like animals in heat. Her mind was mush and the pleasure was so great. It didn't matter that she couldn't think. She just wanted it to last forever.

By the time they heard the front door close her shirt was hanging off her shoulder with her bra up and his hand massaging her right breast. His pants were unbuttoned and hanging on his hips with her arms around his waist.

They finally came to their senses. El jumped off of her and across the room in two seconds. She was off the table clawing at her bra and shirt. Thank goodness for El's quick thinking as he opened the fridge and grabbed two beers and tossed her one. As she caught it Dickie walked in and asked if there was anything left over from dinner. They looked at each other and laughed. That kid never seems to get full. Dickie just looked at both of them with a shrug then grabbed an apple and went upstairs. That was a close call, not something you want to happen the first time you make out with your partner and best friend. She felt at that moment they were doomed. How could they just do that after all this time? But when she looked at El and he was walking back to her. She knew everything was going to be fine. He wanted this and it will work out one way or another.

She told him she needed to head home and put the beer down on the table. He grabbed her face and kissed her again. This time it was slow and sweet. When they pulled away he told her to be careful on the way home. She smiled and pulled him back to her, kissed him, and held him close. They kissed a little longer but decided it was time to stop when things started to heat up again. So she headed to the living room, grabbed her things, and kissed him goodbye one last time.

TBC

What will happen now? Will they regret it or will they see where this will lead them?


	2. Chapter 2

This is my first story and I am so overwhelmed that 300 people have read the first chapter in two days. Thank you all for reading.

Also thank you to the ones who left a review. You gave me the courage to continue.

Chapter 2

She didn't get much sleep last night, not with all the thoughts of what took place in his kitchen hours before. The thoughts of what they could possibly be in the future. She tried to sleep while she lay on the couch; but the only thing that led to was this dream.

_They were in his kitchen right where they left off last night. He hand was massaging her breast, the other cupping her ass, while his hot mouth was making love to hers. She couldn't believe this was happening. If there was a Heaven she just found it. He began moving his mouth over her cheek until he made is way to her ear. He roughly whispered how much he needed her. Then he bit her earlobe and made a path of kisses down her neck sucking and biting. He brought his hand up quickly to her waist band of her jeans trying to unbutton them hastily. At the angle they were in he was having some difficulty. She wasn't any help because she was desperately clawing at his shirt with her head thrown back. He was getting impatient he grunted and pushed his erection into her core hard. All she could do is moan loudly. They were in a frantic state and they were losing control. Desperate to get where they wanted. Within minutes they would be at their peaks. She continued moaning louder and he just kept rubbing her core harder and faster just in the right spot. _

She woke up panting and very wet needing a release. The dream seemed so real. She needed him so much. What was she going to do if this doesn't happen between them? The need for him to be here with her was great. She knew she couldn't call him so soon; especially not tonight. She was in deep and she didn't really want to get out.

Even though she was in the state she was in, she couldn't help but think. He was still technically married and they were partners. The partnership could be an easy thing to deal with. There are other cops who were partners and had relationships. As far as she could see Kathy had been MIA for a year. It didn't look like she was coming back. At least that's what she thought.

This afternoon El showed up around 3:00 without any notice. She was a little stunned; but extremely happy to see him. She reached for him right away to hug and kiss him. He moved aside to avoid her touch. He walked over to the window in living room looking out into the city. She knew something horrible had happened. He had changed his mind about last night. Less than 24 hours, her hopes and dreams were given to her and were about to be destroyed.

When she turned to look at him across the room, she could tell he was having a hard time. She walked over to sit on the couch, stared straight ahead at the wall, and waited for the ball to drop. She knew he was going to tell her he was transferring out; because of what they did. Tell her Saturday visits were over. It was all a mistake and he was wrong to let it happen.

She was surprised when he finally spoke with a quivery voice; said Kathy came back this morning. He never told her the reason why Kathy left to begin with; but she thought Kathy was gone for good. She couldn't believe after all this time Kathy was back. He said they talked things over. That it was best for Eli for them to work things out. He didn't want to do this to her; but he didn't have a choice. She could hear his voice crack, as he told her he needed to do what was best for his children. He still loved her and wanted to be with her more than anything. He said he didn't tell Kathy what had happened last night. For that she was thankful. Kathy knowing would be devastating. She's sure he would lose Eli. She didn't want that to happen.

When he finished talking, he walked over to her to sit down. She was still staring at the wall in front of her. He grabbed her and held her tight, as they began to cry. She felt like her world had just ended. She still had something to hold on to. They still had their partnership. They would get to see each other everyday, that's good. Things will be okay; she was sure of it. At least that's what she tried to believe.

Before he left he told her that he was sorry; he hoped she understood. She assured him that it was for the best and they would see each other at work. With a solemn look on his face he turned and walked out the door. She sank back down on the couch, with her head in her hands, as her heart split into.

Now hours later she is sitting in the dark wondering why her life can't be easier. She doesn't understand why she can't have the things Kathy has. She wants a man that isn't hers and it's selfish. She knows this. It's been a year and she's grown to love this man more than she ever had before. He is the only person in her life whom knows more about her than anyone else in this world and loves her anyway. This past year with him has been wonderful and she would never regret the time they've shared. It's going to hard knowing their time outside of work is over. It's probably going to be harder for Eli. She is going to miss seeing that kid. Maybe when things settle down she could ask El and Kathy if Eli could hang out with her some.

As the tears fall down her face, she doesn't understand why this hurts so much. They were just friends and last night was the first time they acted on their deeper feelings. It was just a little making out. It didn't last that long. She shouldn't be this upset.

Who is she kidding? She has loved this man for years. Now that she knows what it's like to kiss him and be held by him. She doesn't know how she's going to be able to deal with all this. All she can think about what could have been.

TBC

Will they be able to go back to what they had before?

Sorry. I know it was hard to read. I have a plan I promise.


	3. Chapter 3

I thought I would go ahead and post this chapter. I think everyone will enjoy this one a little better. At least I hope.

Chapter 3

A few weeks have gone by since Kathy came back. Everything seems to be back to normal. Well as normal as possible. They've worked together like everything is fine. At work they never talk about anything, except the cases. It has been killing them both. She has the overwhelming feeling to hold him. Tell him everything is fine; but it's not. They catch themselves looking at each a few minutes too long. People are beginning to notice the tension between them again. The tension had disappeared this past year; but it's back with a vengeance. She tries to deny what happened. But how can she forget about the one thing she has wanted for years.

He called her twice. The conversations were brief; but pleasant. It was good to be able to talk to him. The second time he called was last Saturday morning. She could hear the Eli in the background laughing. It made her miss him even more. El said the little guy missed her and wondered why she hadn't come by. Kathy overheard him and asked what he was talking about. El told her on Saturdays they all would get together some times. He didn't say anything more about it. So, Kathy dropped the subject.

She has no idea if Kathy and he are getting along or not. That subject is off limits. She assumes Kathy knows he had called; at least she hopes. She doesn't want to cause any problems between them. He assures her that everything is fine.

Until last night.

He showed up at her apartment around 11:30. His eyes were bloodshot and he was swaying slightly. She knew right away he was drunk. She watched him, as he sat on the couch. He began telling her it was over between Kathy and him. Stunned once again, she stood there starring at him. Horrible thoughts invaded her mind.

_He told Kathy what happened between them. Her heart was pounding out of her chest. She didn't know what to say or do. She was going to have to quit her job. Then move as far away from New York as she could get. She couldn't face the fact she had ruined his marriage. That was the last thing she wanted. How could she have been so lost in her own feelings that night? Neither of them thought about the consequences of their actions. That one make out session ruined them for good. They couldn't get past it. _

While her mind was going over all of the wrongs she had done, he just looked at her. He was sitting there waiting for her to say something. She didn't respond; because honestly what could she say. She, in a moment of weakness, destroyed his marriage of 20 something years. So she stood there looking at him. He turned his head toward the window. Said he was expecting this; but it still hurt. This is it. This is when she has to hear this past year was a mistake. She really screwed up this time. The tears sprang in her eyes. There was no holding them at bay.

Then he said something she wasn't expecting at all. Kathy got a call yesterday from a man who lived in Utah. Apparently they dated while she was there. Kathy said she had talked to the lawyer the other day, to start divorce proceedings. She wanted Eli to go back with her in a few weeks. El said he had no clue she was planning any of this. This was the last thing he thought she would do to them. It wasn't the fact Kathy wanted a divorce or wanted to leave him. It was that she wanted to take Eli away from him. He raised that little boy by himself for the past year. She never called or sent a letter to let them know she was okay. She didn't deserve Eli.

After standing there in shock, Liv finally came to her senses. She went straight to him wrapping him up in her arms. She wanted to take all of this away. A part of her was happy that Kathy was leaving for good. This was not the way to do. El has to fight for custody. They sat there silently, thinking about what had just taken place.

She finally got the courage to ask him why he didn't call her or come over instead of going to the bar. He said he didn't want to bring her in the middle of this mess. He loved her too much; but while he was there he couldn't stop thinking about her. So he called a cab and came over. She told him she was thankful. She was always there for him no matter what.

He looked into her eyes and that's all it took. He leaned in and kissed her. It was a soft sweet kiss full of passion. It was wonderful to feel and taste him again. They pulled apart gasping. Their emotions were everywhere. They wanted more; but knew this wasn't the time. With all that happened with Kathy, they needed to wait. So they held each other tightly. She assured him everything would be okay. They would get through this together.

After a while, they decided to get a little sleep. She walked him to her bedroom. As they got into bed she grabbed him and kissed him sweetly. He put his head on her shoulder and was sound to sleep within minutes.

As she watches him sleep in her arms; she prays things will turn out okay. All she can think about is the future and what will become of it.

TBC

What will happen next? Will Liv and El's relationship grow in the mist of it all?

Thank you for reading and staying with me through this. I hope this makes up for the last chapter. Please Review.


	4. Chapter 4

**Glad you guys are still reading. This chapter is rated *M*… ;) I hope you enjoy. **

Chapter 4

She must have fallen asleep at some point; because the sun was shining bright when she awoke. All the thoughts came back to her as her eyes opened. The room was cold and quiet. She turned to look at El sleeping; but all she found was an empty bed. Glancing at the clock, it was 6 am. She rose up quickly, looking around for any signs of him. Panicking she got up out of bed and went straight to the living room. There he was standing by the window looking out. He was a beautiful man. Everything about him was incredible. She has always known this about him; but seeing him in her living room in boxers was something completely different.

He didn't notice her coming in the room. She took this opportunity to really look at him. She loved him with all of her heart. There is no doubt about it now. The urge to go to him and wrap her arms around him was strong. But she didn't want to complicate things for him. They decided to wait until things settled down. So she just stood and watched him.

She remembered while they were in bed last night. The feel of him hugging her tightly from behind was wonderful. She had always dreamed about it many times. The dreams never compared to the real thing. At one point she wanted to turn to face him; but she didn't want to wake him. He was exhausted and needed to rest. It felt like home to her. Something she has never felt in her entire life.

While she was daydreaming about last night; he must have seen her. When she looked at him he was smiling at her with a goofy grin. He asked her what she was thinking about. She said oh nothing much with a smirk. He came over to her and kissed her long and deep. She was about to pass out from the lack of oxygen. Then he pulled away only slightly to look in her eyes. He wanted her; the look in his eyes said it. She couldn't stand it anymore. She grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him in for another kiss. This was going too far too fast. With the lack of clothing between them he would be in her in no time. They had just agreed last night to wait. Now they are going at it like they did at his house weeks ago. This will be over before they knew what was happening. She needed to slow things down before they regretted it. She tried she really did. But her mouth was so busy sucking and biting at his neck. In the mean time, his hands were in the back of her panties cupping her bare ass. Yes, her bare ass oh Jesus this was really going to happen right here.

The next thing she knew her panties were pooled around her feet and her shirt was thrown on the table next to them. He picked her up and carried her over to the table. Within seconds she was on her back and he was sucking her left breast. She was going to die. He was sucking her nipple like a baby. Wow she felt like she was in some kind of alternate universe. She was holding on to him for dear life. One of his hands was massaging her other breast; while the other was making its way to her core. He was about to touch her in the right spot when his cell phone rang.

They both froze hoping it wasn't his; but unfortunately it was. Oh dear God why now. Talk about bad timing. He looked up at her with his eyes full of lust. She sighed and watched him rise up to look for the phone. He located it. Then walked over to answer it; she got up reaching for her shirt. She knew that was the end of that session. She was beginning to wonder if this would ever happen.

A few minutes passed and he was still on the phone talking quietly. She decided to go to the bathroom to give him some privacy. She knew it was probably Kathy. While she was in the bathroom, she began thinking about what almost happened. This thing between them was greater than both of them. What were they going to do? She wanted him so much it physically hurt. She craved him even now, with him in the other room supposedly talking to his soon to be ex wife. She was in trouble and this was going to be the death of her.

She moved to the bedroom looking for clothes to put on. When she looked up there he was at the door with his boxers riding low on his hips. He was leaning on the door frame looking at her with a smirk. He was so gorgeous. Oh no not again. She needed a distraction. So she turned around, bent over to continue looking through her drawer for panties.

He walked over to her and stood behind her. He was so close she could feel his erection against her bare ass. He must have taken his boxers off on the way across the room.

This is not good, he is hard as a rock, and she was sopping wet. He pushed into her as he leaned over her from behind. She didn't say anything, just closed her eyes. He kissed the back of her neck while his arms encircled her waist pulling her to him. God she wanted this so much.

With one thrust he was in her. Oh my goodness, she was going to lose it right here in the middle of her room. She was grasping at his hands that were on her hips. She held on to his hands tightly. Breathing would be good at this point she thought. She took a deep breath. Then he began to move in her slowly at first; so she could adjust to him. He was large and it was a little uncomfortable. She let go of his hands, and grasped her dresser until her knuckles were white. He leaned over her and began sucking the back of her neck again. GOD this felt so good. He kept moaning her name as he thrusts got stronger and deeper. She was on the edge and she didn't care. She was most incredible feeling she has ever felt. She let go of the dresser with one hand and grabbed his neck holding him close.

Before she realized what was going on; she was facing the bed with him still in her from behind. She looked back at him over her shoulder. Questioning what he wanted to do. He pulled out of her while turning her around. She took the opportunity to lean in and kiss him hard and deep. They fell on the bed rolling around. Then he was in her again. He began to pound into her with all the love he had. She looked up at him whispered she loved him. He smiled at her, leaned in, and kissed her passionately. At that moment they both came with such force they both cried out each other's name. They grasped at one another as if it was the end of the world. The last thing she remembers before she drifted off to sleep; was him whispering in her ear that he loved her too.

TBC

**So.. Will they regret it? Will this complicate things? What about custody of Eli?**

**I hope you enjoyed reading. Please Review. **


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

This time when she wakes up it's to a loud ringing sound. She reaches for the alarm then falls back into bed. She feels sluggish like she drank a gallon of whisky. She shouldn't have a hangover; she didn't drink last night. Then it all comes back to her. She opens her eyes wide looking around. Did they really do that or was it a dream? The soreness between her legs answered that question. They had sex. She and Elliot had sex! It's not the time to panic. She needs to get up and think. When she turns around he isn't in bed. This is the second time this morning she has woken up with him gone. He probably was in the living room again. She gets up and heads to the bathroom.

When she finishes, she walks in the living room. There is on sign of him. Where could he be? Did he leave without waking her to say goodbye? That doesn't seem like him at all. She decides not over think this; so she makes herself some coffee. She looks over at the clock; she has to be at work in an hour.

When she is getting dressed she thinks about calling him. Then she thinks that's not a good idea, too needy. This is going to drive her mad, there is not doubt. They made love this morning. At least that's what it was to her. Please, he can't regret what they did. That will kill her. She sits on the end of the bed sighing, she knew they should have waited.

She finally arrives at work 30 minutes late. Cragen is not happy when he calls out to her. She walks into his office. He looks at her with a strange look, asks what is going on. Oh shit does he already know? Did El already tell him? She has to keep her cool. She impassively shrugs. He informs her Elliot called in sick today. She tells him she hasn't talked to El. That she doesn't know what is going on. She was just running late this morning. He nods and says well get to work. She lets out a long breath and goes to work.

After a long ass day at work she finally gets home. He is still on her mind. She has worried about him all day. He never called her to explain his disappearing act this morning.

While cooking dinner she remembers the phone call he received this morning. Maybe he went to talks things over with Kathy. The urge to call him is takes over her. She picks up the cell and dials his number; it goes straight to voice mail. Her head is going to explode, she needs a Tylenol. This man is going to be the death of her.

After dinner she decides to take a bubble bath to try to relax. While she is in the tub she hears a knock at the door. Just great she thinks. She gets out of the tub, wraps up in her robe, and heads to the door.

She knows it's him before she opens the door. He is still wearing the clothes from last night. She reaches for him right away. He goes to her and hugs her. She looks into his eyes and she gives him a quick kiss. When she begins pulling him in the apartment, he stops her. She looks at him with a puzzling look. Then he turns around and bends down to pick up something. She hadn't noticed Eli standing behind him. When El turns, Eli's has tears running down his face. She takes him from El and holds him tightly to her. Moving to the couch she notices El is right behind her. They all sit down holding each other in a hug. Something's happened and she's not sure she is ready to know about it. El pulls away and just looks at her for a moment, then takes Eli. He walks into her bedroom.

She just sits there wondering what is going on. A little bit later, he returns without Eli. He must have laid him down to sleep. He walks over to her as she stands up. He grabs her up, grasping at her hair, begins kissing her roughly. She pulls back from him and gives them some space. What is going through his mind right now? Eli is in the other room. She steps back from him; he just looks at her with hurt in his eyes. She asks him what happened today. He steps toward reaching for her again. She lets him this time. He pulls her into him while he grabs her neck and kisses her deep. He finally stops and sighs deeply. She reaches up and cups his cheeks wanting him to tell her. It had to have something to do with Kathy. He moves back to the couch. She just waits patiently.

Before he can say anything; Eli whimpers from her bedroom. They both start toward the room; she tells him to stay. When she gets in the room; the little guy is in the middle of her bed. He is sitting up with his thumb in his mouth. She goes over to the bed and sits beside him. He reaches for her immediately. She hugs him and tells him everything is okay. He looks up at her and he shakes his head no. He begins to sob. With tears in her eyes she pulls him into her lap. She rocks him back and forth trying to sooth him. There is so much going through her mind, she doesn't know what has happened. Eli being this upset, she knows something is wrong.

While she consoles Eli, she notices El standing at the end of the bed. She turns to looks at him with questioning eyes. She needs to know what is going on. El walks over to her and put his hand on Eli's back. He looks in her eyes and whispers the lawyer called today. The custody hearing is next Friday. Kathy told Eli this afternoon what she's planning. Eli cried and didn't want to go to Utah with her. He begged his daddy to keep him and not let her take him away. El told Kathy he would take Eli out tonight for dinner to calm him. After they ate they came over. They sigh and she hugs Eli a little tighter while El sits down behind her. He wraps his arms around her, looking down at Eli drifting off to sleep.

This precious little boy she has truly loved since the day he was born; sleeps soundly with his little hand on his chest. She puts her hand over his, feelings his chest rise and fall. She looks across the bed at El; who is finally asleep as well. She regrets not calling him earlier in the day. If she had known, she would have been there for them. She looks at them sleeping in her bed. The feeling of warmth and home flows through her.

She wishes Kathy would have just stayed away. She knows it's selfish; but Eli being torn away from all of them isn't fair. What bothers her most is the fact that Eli is probably so confused by all of this. It breaks her heart.

TBC

**Will Kathy get custody? What will happen between them?**

**Thanks for reading. **


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

The following week had been an emotional rollercoaster.

All they thought about was Eli. Elliot took the entire week off from work to spend it with Eli. Kathy had moved out and was staying at a hotel in Queens. They agreed Eli could spend some time with each of them every other day, until the hearing on Friday.

El hired lawyer on Monday, he knew through work. Robert Burrell was a great child custody attorney. Burrell assured El that he didn't have anything to worry about. Kathy couldn't take Eli away like this after being out of their lives this past year. The judge would not allow it. The law usually favors the mother with custody battles; but this case was different. A mother that neglects a child in any way loses creditability. If she had kept in touch with the family or visited during the past year, her chances would be better. But as it stands she doesn't have much in her favor. El was happy to hear this; but still worried.

Eli was still upset at the possibility he may have to leave. He told Kathy he wanted to stay with his daddy and brother and sisters. Kathy tried to explain to him that she missed him while she was gone. She wanted him with her in Utah. Eli cried and told her he wanted to stay here. Kathy tried to convince El to talk to him and explain to him he needed to be with his mother. El told her it was Eli's choice.

El came by on the nights Eli was with Kathy to eat when she got home from work. He wanted to fill her in on what was going on. He told her about Eli and how it is truly hurting him. She can't believe how selfish Kathy was being. Of course she was Eli's mother, but she should have thought about that before she left him a year ago.

While they were sitting on the couch one night, she decided to ask him what been on her mind for a week.

She leaned on his shoulder looking at the TV and started, "El, are you okay with everything that happened between us. I don't want what happened to be a mistake. I have wanted to make love to you for a long time. I have loved you longer than I could ever admit. If you want us to go back to what we had, I will try to do that. I just don't want to lose what we've had."

He turned, cupped her cheeks with his hands, looked into her eyes and replied, "What I said to you after we made love was the truth. I love you with all my heart and have for a long time. When Kathy left it made me realize what I really wanted; but was afraid to say anything." Then he leaned in kissed her deeply and hugged her as tears ran down her cheeks.

They sat there for a while thinking about what would happen in a few days. The verdict will change their lives forever. If he gets custody, then Eli will be with him for good. If he doesn't, he will get Eli two weeks every summer and on certain holidays. That will kill them all. The judge has to agree that Eli belongs with El.

**Thursday night**

Last night El brought Eli by to visit. We fixed some popcorn and played games. It was like old times. She has missed him so much. While they were putting up the last game before they had to go.

Eli stood up and asked, "May Daddy and I stay the night? I want to sleep in your big bed again. Please?" He looked up at his daddy and El melted.

El just looked over to her and said, "It's okay with me if it's okay with you."

She just smiled and said, "Alright. But we have to go straight to sleep. You guys have a busy day tomorrow." Eli jumped up and down, then grabbed her around the neck, and squeezed her tight. He turned and ran to her room, jumping on the bed.

They heard him say, "Come on, you two it's bed time." They both looked at each other and laughed. They loved that little boy so much. El walked up to her and hugged her close and kissed her gently on the lips. They pull apart with tears in their eyes. Then they walked into the bedroom, got ready for bed. When they finally were in bed, snuggled up and drifted off to sleep thinking about what the future holds for them.

_**Day of the Hearing**_

This morning, El and Eli were up and on the way out of the door by 6:00 am. She walked them out hugging Eli tightly and then El. She watched them go down the hall with tears flowing down her face. Turning to go back inside, she prayed all of this will turned out alright. She didn't know what would happen to El if he lost that little boy. She sighed and went to get dressed for work.

Around 10:30 am she is working a call with Fin when she gets a call. El needs her to come to the courthouse. Fin drops her off on the way back to the prescient. When she reaches the top of the stairs, she sees Kathy and Eli standing together. She walks over to them slowly not wanting to interrupt them. She looks around from El, but she doesn't see him at all. Eli reaches for Kathy to pick him up, she hugs him. While Liv is standing there Eli notices her and motions for her to come over. She timidly walks up to them. Eli make a beeline to her, grabbing at her legs and holding on tight. She reaches down and picks him up. He puts his head on her shoulder and stays that way. She squeezes him and that's when El walks up behind her. He gives her a side hug and pats Eli on the back. Kathy shyly smiles at Liv and then nods and walks away.

Was that it? That's all there was. She had so many questions. Eli leans back in her arms and whispered, "I get to stay with Daddy." He begins bouncing in her arms and grinning from ear to ear. She can't believe it. El looks at Liv and says, "The hearing went by so fast. It took 45 minutes for the judge to come to a decision." She looks over at El with the biggest smile. They lean into each other and kiss quickly. At that moment, they realize that is one of the best days they've had in a long time.

They leave the courthouse and head down the street to eat breakfast. Eli is between them as they walk down the sidewalk. He was smiling and giggling. She looks down at him with the biggest grin, she know life from here on out will be different. Different in a great way, she hopes she know what it's like to be apart of this family.

Then she looks over at El and gives him a wink. She lips "I love you both so much." Then she smiles.

He lets go of Eli's hand and reaches over wrapping his arm around her shoulders and says, "Love you too."

She doesn't know what the future holds with El, but right now she is extremely happy.

**The End**

**I would like to thank all of you for reading my first fic. I hope you enjoyed it.**

**Please Review**


End file.
